A Mother’s Love

During Tommy’s hospitalization there were so many people who came to see him.  And while I was often in the good company of others, the times when I wasn’t were excruciating.  I still remember the tribulation of staying that first night in the hospital alone.  My mom had offered to stay overnight with me and take the next day off of work so I wouldn’t be there by myself. She had just started her new job though and I felt guilty accepting her proposal so I relented and told her I would be fine.  After insisting (borderline demanding) over and over to stay with me, I was finally able to convince my mom I’d be okay on my own.  Still, she brought me blankets and food she knew I wouldn’t eat and sat with me in the lobby until close to midnight.  The doctors didn’t let me sleep in Tommy’s room the first couple of nights because he was on 24 hour care so after visiting hours I was summoned to the lobby. As it got really late I pretended to fall asleep on a recliner so as to not keep my mom any longer. Before she left for the night she asked the nurses to bring me extra pillows and told me to call her if I needed anything.  When she was finally gone, my heart sank into a deeper hole than the one it was in as I felt the loneliness and panic immediately creep in.

Hospital lobbies are an especially daunting place at 7 A.M. The silence echoed through out the hallways and the inertia invoked my despair to torment me.  After what seemed like an eternity of being there alone,  I picked up the phone at 9 AM the next morning to call my mom.  I knew she was working and wasn’t expecting her to pick up.  When she did I immediately started sobbing.  “Amy, what’s going on?” she asked right away.  The concern was obvious in her tone.  “Mom…” I said in between sobs.  “I can’t be here alone. It’s too hard”.  Without even a breath in between her next words she replied, “I’m coming right now” and hung up.

When she got to the hospital we sat together in the lobby for hours without much conversation.  Even in the silence her presence brought me so much comfort. As I had shared in a previous post, I kept a journal that I wrote letters to Tommy in during his coma.  Anytime someone came to visit him, I asked them to contribute in it.  That morning I asked if my mom wanted to write in it.  “Sure”, she said.  She took the journal and sat down in a chair across from me.  She looked at the wall and pondered for a few moments about what she wanted to write.  “I want to write something, but I don’t know how to write in English” she lamented.  “Then write in Hmong,”  I replied. “But he won’t be able to read it then”, she grieved with disappointment in her voice.  “It’s okay, Mom,” I assured. “Just write what you want to say to him.”  So she did.  When Tommy woke up and learned about the letters, he asked me to read every single one to him.  When we got to my mom’s letter it was especially emotional for the both of us.  Today we keep that journal next to our bed where its remedial contents fill our home with love and intent. Because my moms letter was particularly special, we had it blown up and found the perfect spot for it in our bedroom where we read it every day and feel her unfailing love.

The direct translation reads:

“Tommy today I am here with Amy because you are sleeping and can’t hear us.  I’m so worried and sad that I can’t work.  You’ve been asleep for 2 days now.  We are all very worried about you but I’ve prayed to God every day that he’ll give you two another chance.  When you wake up I want you to promise me that you will love Amy and will stay by her side until the end.  Tommy I love you like you are my own son, but I’ve never actually told you.  I pray that God will heal you so that we can become a family.  

Lov you, Mom”

And yes, she forgot the ‘e’ in ‘love’ because she’s a fob and she’s the best mom in the whole wide world.

4 comments on “A Mother’s Love

  1. I am very thankful for your love and help for them, I did ask Amy if she want me to stay, but she said I be ok, as walking out I told my husband she’s so brave. I pray that Amy and Tommy will live a happily ever after! Love then very much!
    Thank you again to your love help and support though out their lives!

    1. Of course!! Tommy could not have gotten through this entire thing without the love of the first woman who ever loved him with all her heart – his mom! He is so lucky to have you as his mom and we are BOTH so blessed to have two of the best moms who would do anything for us and are always there to heal our broken hearts. We love you both so much!!

  2. What a beautiful story to share! Mom’s are so great and are always there when we needed them the most! I’m glad to hear that Tommy came out of his coma and that you too are together again! Thank you for sharing!

  3. Beautiful post! A mother’s love is something indescribable! Anytime something is wrong in my life; I need my mom. Thanks for sharing a wonderful story!

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